What is Mindfulness?

Learning to train your awareness to be present without judgement - mindfulness - takes practice and training. We can be mindful about anything as long as we are paying attention in the present moment and cultivating an open and accepting attitude. You can mindfully talk to a friend, fold the laundry, or walk to work. But for most of us, our minds are not present much of the time. Our human minds evolved to spend much of our time ruminating about the past or worrying about the future. Although this is quite normal, it can rob us of the beauty of our present moment lived experience in the world. While our minds wander, our bodies remain present in time, ignored, yet feeling the emotional reactions accumulated from the roaming mind. This can leave us feeling anxious or depressed and lacking clarity about why. This constant flow of thoughts that take us into past and future often has a critical nature - they call this the “cognitive negativity bias”. The thinking mind wants to judge ourselves and others, compare, categorize, and sometimes it can be quite harsh. Because there is a constant flow of thought happening in the background of our consciousness all the time, and because these thoughts tend to be judgmental, this mental content becomes the unexamined backdrop of our lives. Whether we realize it or not, it colors how we see everything. This background of judgmental, worried thoughts can make it hard to relax and enjoy our lives, and can influence our reactions to experiences in a way that exacerbates our suffering. Mindfulness asks us to wake up from this trance of thought and see the moment more clearly without all our judgments and reactions glued to it. 

What is Meditation?

Fortunately, the mind is like a muscle that can be trained with practice just like muscles in the rest of the body. Meditation is the workout our minds need to become more capable of living in the present moment. Meditation is simply the practice of training the mind to concentrate in the present moment in a particular way. Rather than judgmentally scrutinizing one’s present moment experiences, meditation teaches us to observe anything that arises in the present (an itch, a sound, a difficult thought or feeling) with curiosity and openness, patiently observing the sensation and then returning the awareness back to an anchor in the present moment. The most common present moment anchor for awareness is the breath - but you can use many other anchors (sounds, feet on the floor, a candle flame). The key is to persistently but patiently bring the mind’s attention back to your anchor again and again, with acceptance, perhaps even humor, at how quickly the mind wanders into thought. 

Why learn to meditate?

Prior to learning mindfulness skills, most people operate from a place of feeling very identified with our thoughts and feelings. I AM mad, I AM a failure. Mindfulness and meditation offer the gift of zooming out and seeing the ever-changing nature of our thoughts and feelings as a series of content and reactions that aren’t necessarily true or permanent. Instead of identifying so much with the moment-to-moment content produced by the mind, we have the opportunity to identify with a deeper part of ourselves that is more compassionate, perhaps more connected to what we care about most in the world. This offers a more stable ground of being to settle into while watching the ebb and flow of inner experiences change and flow with a kind and compassionate heart. This shift allows us to observe the inner sea when it is choppy, when it is still, and yet see it from a place of more clarity and calm. Finding this place of calm takes practice, and meditation is the daily practice of sitting - for 10 minutes a day or more - and watching your inner world, training your awareness to be present and curious. It’s not easy! The mind throws us tens of thousands of thoughts a day, and some of them are very compelling! Sitting and watching the mind for a short time every day slowly cultivates the ability to remain in a state of greater ease and balanced presence more often, so that when life throws us curveballs - AND IT WILL! - we can respond more intentionally rather than just reacting automatically. 
Formal and Informal MindfulnessBecoming present for your life can be cultivated in the formal practice of meditation and also in informal practice throughout your day. Every moment is an opportunity to wake up and observe your life through the lens of non-judgemental awareness and curiosity. Notice when you have little opportunities throughout the day to remain present for your 5 senses. Notice the urge to get lost in thought or pick up your phone and zone out. In the line a the grocery store when you’re bored or impatient, open your ears to the sounds around you. When you’re in traffic feeling frustrated see if you can tune into the temperature of the air, the feel of the seat beneath you. When you’re talking to a friend and thinking of what to say next, consider slowing down and paying exquisite attention to what they’re saying rather than what’s next. When you realize you missed a deadline, or you’re late to an appointment, or your hard drive crashed, or you didn’t get invited to an event…can you take 10 long deep breaths and feel inside for all the emotions that arise? Can you stay with them without clinging to them or pushing them away? All of these are opportunities to bring your mindfulness practice into your everyday life. 

If you’d like to learn more about mindfulness and meditation, several times per year I offer Koru Mindfulness, a 4-week introductory course, out of my office. To learn more about current course and workshop offerings, click on the EVENTS tab above.